Not to go all Natasha Bedingfield on ya, but really what a concept. We wake up every day with the freedom to choose whether we will carpe the diem, or just let it waste away. How incredible is that? Every single day we have the ability to rewrite our narrative chapter by chapter until our lives transform into a whole new story. I hear so many people complain about how unfair life is. I get it. If you want to be in a constant state of comparison then NYC is the place to be. Here in the big Apple, we're constantly striving for more.
The city is a buffet, but with the right moves you could potentially earn yourself anything on the menu. We've become so bored with the buffet and we want the next best thing. It doesn't matter the buffet is full of variety and able to sustain our needs, because beyond it lies the next best thing. None of us know what that thing is, but we can confirm it exists. For every apartment there is another with better amenities, location and offerings. For every job there is a competitor with better titles, compensation and perks. For every relationship, there is an illusion of someone else who checks every box and is somehow still intriguing and mysterious.
Nothing can be enough because everything can be improved. We have spin bikes in pools and DJs with strobe lights at HIIT classes. We have apps to help us meet our match. Each app promising to deliver your soulmate and competing with one another over features like your ability to hide your public profile and filter by height and alcohol consumption.
The world is our oyster. Anything we want we can have and yet we fixate on what we lack. Today is the last Sunday of the summer, which is the perfect time to start reevaluating goals for the fall. I've been in a somewhat transitional phase. Things have been absolutely wonderful and I'm extremely happy, but I find myself asking, what's next?
My 5 year anniversary of moving to the city is right around the corner, September 2nd. I think about how much I've changed in five years and it blows my mind. I don't remember being scared of coming to NYC, but I do remember being scared of the thought of staying in Louisiana. I knew without a shadow of a doubt that my dream life awaited me in NYC. I never felt anxious or questioned how it would work out. I was operating in fight or flight mode and letting the universe guide me. I trusted that if I set my intentions and lived by faith that I would accomplish my goals.
I broke the process down and though it was challenging and frustrating, I never gave up. I sold everything, found a roommate, created a budget, established goals and hopped on that one-way flight never to return. Was moving to the city without knowing anyone and without having a job or any proof that I would make it scary? Absolutely, but if I had never tried I would've risked so much more.
I definitely felt at times that I bit off more than I could chew. Everything in NYC is a process. Finding apartments, friends, boyfriends and jobs was overwhelming. There were and are days still where I come home completely defeated. When I feel defeated, or a funk coming on, I proactively fight against it. I remind myself of my past accomplishments and future goals and it gives me the strength to keep going.
So far, 2017 has been my favorite year in NYC. This is the year I feel I've grown the most and set the most boundaries for myself. I've stopped blaming others for problems I'm facing and begun soul searching to find out what it is that I want for myself and for my life.
Life is fast and fleeting, but we can make it beautiful. Regardless of your beliefs on after life there is one thing we can all agree to right now. That is that we are here and that's all we know and it's all we're guaranteed. What if the breath you're taking right now is your last? Are you pleased with your life? Is there more you could be doing? And I don't mean trading an old toy for a new fancier version. I mean what can you do to make yourself the next best thing? Forget your material desires and really envision you and your soul in the universe. What does that look like? What does it feel like for you?
I used to be scared to ask myself these questions. I had become so accustomed to living in survivor mode that I didn't know how to handle shifting into thriving mode. When you go from surviving to thriving you have the luxury of thinking about how you want to become versus who you simply have to be to get by.
My goal in moving to the city was to close a very ugly chapter of my life. I had a near death situation that jolted my psyche into a realization that if I didn't take control of my life, my life would take control of me. I closed that book of my life and decided to rewrite my story, but in doing that I forgot to remind myself of the pain.
Sometimes taking a quick glance in the rear view reminds you of lessons you must forgive, but not forget. That lesson taught me that life is precious. That people are humans capable of doing terrible things. That things aren't always fair or easy and don't always make sense. Most importantly that you have to forge a plan and trust the universe.
So go out into the world guns blazing and channel your inner badass. Don't cut yourself short and don't listen to anyone who wants to rain on your parade. Things won't always work out, or go as planned, but that's ok. Take that class, quit that job, kiss that man… just do it all, do everything now while you can. The most important part is to never stop growing.